archives (by month):
2010: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep
2009: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2008: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2010: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep
2009: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2008: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
george stop don't get in that car dick cheney's gonna be president if you do

police vowed to step up patrols in the warehouse district downtown after yet another officer was brutally assaulted by gravity on thursday

then you unroll the condom down the length of the banana like so and finally since this is an abstinence only state I'm legally required to note that this procedure does not work on anything other than bananas

with all due respect senator mccain the american financial system ultimately rests on the backs of the middle-class taxpayers we need to lift them up if we are to ensure the future of the nation yeah we need to lift em up then bend em over and fuck em real good

since it's approval in 1994 the large hadron collider has generated jokes

are you sure man we don't have oxygen with us I don't wanna get trapped in the wrong place dude I'm positive gps unit says the fire's directly behind us we gotta go this way hold onto your saw and follow me

the man's neighbords described his yard sign as ignorant and ugly one who declined to give his name said that you'd have to live in a cave to think seantor obama is a muslin most of us know damn well he's a satanist

justin no drop the rope it's not worth it my pokemons are in there i ain't ever gonna catch 'em all again

to greet one another humans say hello or the equivalent in another language many animals lack the gift of speech and will greet by placing each others hands in their mouths below are two common examples of this greeting behavior two wild south american pointy dogs exchange good mornings glad you could make it says one blue-headed forest finch to his friend

well howdy it's a pleasure to meet you mr mccain sir john i apologize the old memory bank ain't so good anymore don't feel bad mr. president some days I can't even remember to oppress women

think edward where did you last hoard it

on saturday I visited a sick teenager in missouri she asked me senator are you sure that you can perform a lung transplant I looked her right in the eye and i said yes we can shelby yes we can

that's a big hole yup you gon' take a picture of it yup

how many times have I farted since 9/11 september 19, 2004 the beginning of a nine month barbecue rib binge january 5, 2006 chinese restaurant down the street went off health violation status and began serving food march 2, 2006 february was rank total 935

what about what about this thing you ever tried makin' these guys into gas that's corn mr. president we use that to feed cattle refine into corn syrup it's used thousands of ways and it's vital to our nation's food supply okay smart guy if it's so good why don't you turn it into gasoline

I'm really sorry about last week mr. jones I had a death in the family and I was too overwhelmed with sadness to attend class

in a statement issued thursday the national aeronautics and space administration condemned recent budget cuts claiming that their research would benefit not only americans but the entire world

ma'am I know you're upset but if it makes you feel better you're not the only one over half oa all ford mustangs end up on in or around a telephone pole

black ice never heard of such a thing well it's gotta be better than banana I guess shit

radial islamic police go to heaven

ultimately the ron paul for president campaign was felled by its own sword the ability of its supporters to remain inside their own homes glued to their computers

the circle of death attracted hundreds of villagers during its heyday soon after it was built it became a magnet for local troublemakers necessitating the creation of the police squad revenue from moving violations went directly to the upkeep of the cirle but after a number of years, the liability of operating the attraction overwhelmed its income and it was dismantled to build the safer yet less impressive boardwalk of death

reynolds you blew up a fuckin' restaurant how are we gonna explain this I didn't blow up nothin' that restaurant committed suicide got the note right here

calm down mr. president those images aren't real take off your glasses with all due respect I'm afraid we can't declar a holy war on the transformers I wish we could too

archives (by month):
2010: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep
2009: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2008: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2010: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep
2009: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec
2008: jan . : . feb . : . mar . : . apr . : . may . : . jun . : . jul . : . aug . : . sep . : . oct . : . nov . : . dec






