rob worked the 8th avenue snowball stand for three winters in a row unaware that his friends who encouraged him to get into selling snow were referring to cocaine

10-30-08

selling snow

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no wi-fi signal ugh guess I'll go mumble incoherently on the sidewalk

10-29-08

no wifi signal

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god if you're listening help me get through this i never wanted to shoot iraqi farmers i just wanted to pay for obedience school

10-28-08

are you there god its me dog

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anime annoying cultural trend or eco-disaster the continent sized vortex of dvd wrappers and cum rags choking the pacific ocean continues to grow at a frightening pace the island nation of japan is responsible for 95% of the world's anime stuck together with nerd jizz so retarded thousand years from now people wonder how we made it to the moon cat-girls huge penises

10-27-08

anime map

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shit where i going to get woppar

10-24-08

we out of meet

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that's when i was like that's not my only index finger

10-23-08

only index finger

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my opponent much like george bush failed the v-sit-and-reach how can he be expected to lead the country if he can't even pass the presidential fitness test

10-22-08

v sit and reach

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you quit gettin' raped now or i'll shoot

10-21-08

quit gettin raped

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bail out a process in which a gigantic turd is pulled out of the toilet stinking up the room and getting shit everywhere rather than simply being flushed

10-20-08

bailout

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civil disobedience 1965 2008

10-17-08

civil disobedience

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i agree that your flaming bus ramp is pretty impressive governor palin but you still didn't answer my question

10-16-08

didnt answer my question

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nice to see you again george great weather huh no bill it's not great weather not great at all in fact the forecast calls for a ninety percent chance of you getting waterboarded if my outlook crashes just one more time

10-15-08

great weather huh

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presidential candidates not for wayne coyne 2008

10-14-08

not for wayne coyne

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hi there little girl i'm george bush the president say next time you see your mommy why don't you ask her to vote for john mccain you can just say the president will outlaw rap before leaving office if mccain loses can you say that

10-13-08

outlaw rap

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excellent question on the subject of net neutrality i'm happy to report that my stance is to ask rick davis about this one and write it here later

10-12-08

john mccain on net neutrality

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i'm sorry senator mccain i'd love to get moving but there's a well-dressed black man standing in the way of the straight talk express

10-10-08

straight talk express

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best of luck senator and I'll see you is there something on my shoulder senator there is isn't there but you're not going to tell me what it is well i'm glad you think it's hilarious keep acting like that and i'm not gonna stick up for you the next time my wife says you look like a catcher's mitt full of yellow chiclets

10-09-08

something on my shoulder

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no my imaginary money

10-08-08

imaginary money

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hello everyone isn't it great to be alive you know every single morning i wake up and i thank god for one more beautiful day that i didn't get in a car accident

10-07-08

great to be alive

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you morons it's me condoleezza rice i was transformed into a cat if you want me to prove it I'll ignore intelligence about terrorist attacks and then support an illegal war on an uninvolved country

10-06-08

condoleezza rice

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hi cindy always a pleasure to see you how's your husband why don't you ask him yourself i tried a couple times but he just smirks and says horseshit

10-03-08

hows your husband

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vladdy you can rear your head and come into my airspace any time sorry bout that interview call me soon xoxo your neighbor s.p.

10-02-08

to russia with love

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last thursday's launch of the chinese shezhou vii spacecraft ended in a horrifying explosion upon re-entry to the earth's atmosphere while the exact cause of the malfunction is not known many believe it was caused by a counterfeit louis vuitton purse left inside the fuel chamber by one of the ten-year-old girls who constructed the spacecraft

10-01-08

chinese space disaster

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